Thanks to all who have been lifting me up in prayer, especially this past week. I've been praying specifically for the things I mentioned at the bottom of the last post, which in a phrase is "open doors." It's a bit long to explain again. Nevertheless, one of the things that I don't remember mentioning before but which has been on my mind is this: I've been wondering how what I do could really be useful to God. And I mean in a spiritual warfare, Ephesians 6 type of way. I want to be actively fighting the good fight and not simply sauntering the spiritual saunter.
Yesterday, I had the wonderful opportunity to hear Anna's story of how she was drawn into her ministry field and started Light Force International. It's a riveting story. But the end result was I was left feeling more than inadequate. I felt like all my dreams and hopes were hopelessly small. Like if I got everything I wanted and was able to serve God to the absolute fullness of all my dreams... I would not be making much of a difference. It was incredibly humbling. And a little confusing. I wondered if maybe God was using this as another stepping stone. Maybe He was simply getting me to a place where I was willing to give up working with choirs. And... I am willing to do that, even more now than before.
However...
This morning I had the wonderful opportunity to worship at a small, lower class Christian school here in San Jose. I went there with one of Josh's teams. During the worship, God reminded me of something that Anna said that I have believed for some time but never really contemplated. She said that in her opinion,
"Worship is the best form of spiritual warfare."
Wow.
And I think I'll end with that. :)
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